


Is The Villain Supposed To Fall For The Heroes?

by Loestri



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Bank Robbery, Because Tony doesn't come without self worth issues, Cuddling, Humour, Identity Porn, Kidnapping, M/M, Movie Night, Nail Painting, Natasha is Omniscient, Pepper is a goddess - Freeform, Science Bros, Science is difficult to write, She is not, Slight torture, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony's unhealthy sleeping habits, Villain Tony Stark, author thinks she is funny, but he likes messing with people, but not really, eventual stuckony, exploding paint robots, he has a heart of gold, hopefully, nothing too graphic, pancake blocking, slight angst, sort of, super villainy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-18
Updated: 2017-03-26
Packaged: 2018-09-09 13:42:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8892877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Loestri/pseuds/Loestri
Summary: Tony is a supervillain. He is. Okay, he sort of is. However he wants people to believe he is! It's working, of course. It is one of his plans. So Tony is a villain and then there's the bank robbery and then there's Steve. Of course with Steve comes Bucky. Then comes the Avengers. He's dealing with it. Like a mature adult would. In no way shape or form does he have a crush on either Steve or Bucky, no that's just ludicrous. The Avengers aren't going to find out his secret identity, they aren't. Really, they aren't. Tony has this all under control.





	1. The Meeting

**Author's Note:**

> I plan on writing more chapters of this but I'm not particularly consistent when it comes to writing and posting chapters, hopefully I'll be better for this one. Please enjoy!

Gunfire sounded in the bank, people dropping to the ground as an instant reaction, he couldn't see anybody who had been hurt, he assumed they'd shot at the ceiling, thousands of curse words flew through his head because fuck it all this was supposed to be his _day off_.

But no, no of course not, no day is a day off for Tony Stark, genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist and super villain. But today was his day off, so today he wasn't a super villain, just another guy, but of course on this day he gets caught in a fucking bank robbery.

"Everybody in a group over here, kneeling, hands behind your head, I want all your bags and phones in the middle over here, we are going to check all of you." The man was authoritative, clearly the leader of the group of about a dozen masked people, all armed with guns, probably three women and about nine men. The civilians all began to move and do as they were told, throwing all belongings they believed could get them into trouble into the middle of the room and kneeling in a group where they were directed, like sheep, Tony followed their lead. Inspecting all of the captives faces they showed what he expected, fear.

Except for the man next to him, a blond, Adonis of a man, he merely looked concerned and annoyed, probably quite like Tony himself, who was this man to feel a sense of calm in a situation like this? Clearly not a civilian.

Tony knelt down in the middle, using Adonis as a shield to hide himself behind slightly, don't want the criminals to know that they have Tony Stark has a hostage, they might start getting ideas. He's wearing civilian clothing and his sunglasses and a hat, his usual precautions to make sure he doesn't get recognised.

Two men were sent to search their captives, and two to guard. The rest going off to do what robbers do. With his hands behind his head it was easy enough to press the discreet button on his watch, the one to alert Jarvis. Hopefully Spidey's available, Tony may not be okay with a kid so young doing the hero job, but he was damn good at it and perfect for times like this.

He should explain that even as the super villain, Iron man, he still made a point to have good connections with super heroes, because things like that come in handy. His meeting with Spidey had him flirting incessantly with him, before Spidey burst out with exasperation that he's only sixteen and then Tony exclaiming that he's just a kid, and what was he doing in the hero business? But after that he made a point to cause minimal chaos for Spidey, most of it's just teasing, he's going to wait till Spidey is an adult before he does anything truly dangerous to him.

Unlike the avengers, they're just so durable, and adorable. They bounce back from whatever he throws at them, it's amazing! Granted they've never managed to catch him, obviously, but that's all part of the fun. His favourite to tease is probably the capsicle, the way he gets all flustered when Tony starts flirting and making innuendoes, it's just the best, and Barnes, when he's not being all winter-soldiery he's a lot of fun. His main regret though is that he can't be friends with dear Dr Banner. One time he caught him after he'd just turned back from being the green rage monster, he didn't do anything horrible, but they managed to have a wonderful science talk, if only he could have Brucie as his science bro, but alas it is not meant to be.

Back to the matter at hand, one of the masked people was searching him now, they wouldn't find anything, he'd gotten rid of all his obvious tech, and the rest was so well hidden they'd never find anything. His only concern came when they took off his hat, goddamn them, because without it, it's pretty fucking obvious who he is. He heard the muttered 'no way' from the guard, before he started calling over his leader.  
"Hey boss, you won't believe this, this guy is Tony fucking Stark." That drew the attention of everybody around them, all the other captives looking at him with opened mouths, it brought back the rest of the group as well.  
"I'll be damned, we hit it lucky with this one, somebody get his stuff from the pile, it's probably worth a fortune. You four" he pointed at four of his stronger members "carry on with the vault, I'm going to have a talk with Mr Stark."  
Outwards Tony was staring them down defiantly, he had a reputation to uphold as a man who didn't take shit from anybody, inwardly he was cursing his bad luck, because of course things can always get worse.  
"So, Mr Stark, fancy seeing you here." Clearly it was said with a smile that no one could see, which was probably for the best.  
"Call me Tony, if we're being friendly." He tried for amiable, it probably came out more begrudging.  
"Unfortunately, friendly isn't what we're doing today." As if that wasn't obvious.  
"I'd noticed." Short and to the point, the more words he used the more likely they were to be sarcastic and get him into more trouble.  
"I'm sure. You may also have noticed the situation we find ourselves in and I think you can help, because soon enough that place out there is going to be full of cops here to stop us. Our original plan was to threaten to kill all the captives if they didn't let us go, but I have a better one. You are going to be our ticket out of here Mr Stark, it'll be easy, I'll put a gun to your head." Which he did as he said this sliding the gun along the side of his face in the mockery of a caress." And if they even try to shoot at any of us, I'll kill you. You're a very influential and important person Mr Stark, they wouldn't let you die." Tony's not so sure, but it won't get to that point because Jarvis is going to help him, that he is sure of.  
"Happy to be of service." Be polite, don't be sarcastic, don't get yourself killed.  
"That glare you're sending me doesn't seem too happy" he was glaring? "I can think of another way you can be of service to me, maybe you'll like this one more. How does that thing you say go? Billionaire, Genius, playboy?" Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist, get it right dickhead "well how would you like to play with us?" Ugh cheesy. The man's hand reached for Tony's wrist, when he pulled it away, all he got was a slap, and the man roughly pulled him to his feet.

None of this is really surprising, because of his reputation as a playboy people often wrongly assume he's down for anything. What is surprising is the sound of outrage from Adonis next to him as he rises to his feet, ready to defend Tony's honour or something knightly like that.  
"Let go of him!" Very sweet, not particularly effective but it didn't really have to be because any moment now Jarvis' reinforcement would arrive and they'd all be fine. Adonis got up in the leaders face, his own face contorted in anger, which was a sight to behold, before he was pulled back by one of the other robbers, his gun ready to keep Adonis at bay.

He'd have to get this guys real name, though Adonis is very fitting, and number, because he'd certainly be down for that.  
"And what are you going to do if I don't?" At this the leader pulled Tony even closer, made ten times worse by his depressingly short stature, he's willing to admit he might be sulking a little at this point, whoever Jarvis had sent (please be Spidey) was taking far too long to arrive. Adonis pulled against the hold the other man had on him, which accentuated his muscles in wonderful ways, maybe Tony could take him out for a drink once this is all over.

Adonis growled, _he actually growled_. If Tony's capable of loving again after Pepper, then this guy might be the one. Unfortunately despite the impressive display all the man holding him did was laugh.  
"I didn't know you had a guard dog Tony, however we're going to have to put him down." Fear flashed through Tony like a lightening bolt, to his relief(?) they simply hit Adonis around the head with a gun, and he crumpled to the ground, he found himself hoping Adonis, a complete stranger, would be okay. He'll check later. And as glass shattered over head it seemed later wouldn't be that far away.

The robbers cursed in surprise when Spidey (thank you J!) flew across the ceiling shooting web at each of the robbers, so they fell over looking like caterpillars. In mere minutes all of the criminals had been rounded up and Spidey was coming over to address the captives. Outside, lo and behold, none other than S.H.I.E.L.D were surrounding the bank, and Jarvis wouldn't send for them, too much risk, so why were they here? Maybe Spidey had called them, whatever the reason he was kinda glad because they had a good medical team and he wanted Adonis to be okay.  
"Everybody, it is going to be okay, please remain calm, leave in an orderly fashion to be checked out by S.H.I.E.L.D medical." Little Spidey almost speaks like an adult, he's very proud. Tony can nearly imagine the way Spidey must be examining everyone, he has to have figured out that the main reason Jarvis would call him in for a bank robbery is if Iron Man or one of Iron Man's friends was inside.

If it wasn't for the fact that he'd clearly been seen with the criminal and Adonis was laid passed out next to him, he probably would have been able to disappear in the mess of people, but again nothing is easy for Tony Stark.  
"Sir, are you okay? Do you need some help with him?" Tony was checking Adonis' vitals, but he could use Spidey's help to get him to medical.  
"If you wouldn't mind." Look at Tony being nice and polite and helping other people with no personal gain. They got under an arm each (God those muscles) and took Adonis to a medical van to which they were directed.

They handed Adonis over to the medical team, Tony decided he'd like to stay to make sure Adonis was okay.  
"Steve! Thank god you're okay!" That came from a beautiful specimen of a man, clearly not from medical, when Adonis (Steve apparently) started to wake. Tony tried to get a good look at the man who knew Steve and _holy shit_ that's Barnes, the Winter Soldier, James Buchanan Barnes, Bucky, best friend of Captain America and Tony's childhood idol. He needs to get out of here in case Barnes notices something similar between him and iron man.  
"Is...is Stark okay?" Steve really needs to be less of an upstanding guy.  
"Here, I'm good, our friendly neighbourhood Spider man came to save the day just after you were knocked out." He needs to go quickly, he doesn't want to get recognised.  
"That's good, I'm glad you're okay." This guy is really too much.  
"Thank you for helping, if you ever need anything, really, just call me, here's my number." He passed over a card, the one with his personal number, to Barnes. Then he bid them goodbye and hightailed it out if there.

\-----

"You sure took your sweet time with that rescue J." He fell onto the sofa in his workshop.  
"I apologise sir, spider man was trying to revise and ignoring me." Tony rolled his eyes, Spidey doesn't need to revise half as often as he does.  
"Whatever, he came, nothing bad happened. Pull up the blueprints I was working on before I left." Jarvis did as he said, bringing up the holographic blueprints for his next upgrade, the heroes are gonna hate this one.  
"Sir you have eight missed calls from Miss Potts." She must have heard he was in the bank today, best not to leave her hanging. He motioned for Jarvis to call her back while he carried on with his work.  
"Tony! You're okay! I was so worried, I saw what happened on the news and couldn't help but thi-" he cut off her worried voice to reassure her.  
"Pepper, I'm fine, more than fine. Honestly I'm so good you have nothing to worry about, I'm okay." He tried to sound reassuring and calm.  
"Okay, okay, you're okay. I'm sorry, but I know how you worry when you're not in your suit." He could hear her small smile, it was sure nice to have someone who knows you as well as you do.  
"They were just some men with guns, I go up against superheroes all the time, I'd alerted Jarvis, I had no reason to worry." Surprisingly enough he actually believed what he was saying.  
"It doesn't mean you won't, well I'm just glad you're okay." He loved this woman.  
"Thank you Pep, it means a lot really." That's enough feelings for now, "so I'm thinking you, me and lunch sometime soon." It had been too long since his last meeting with Pep, his guardian angel deserved more of his time.  
"Next Tuesday three o'clock I have a empty slot that's all yours."  
"Wonderful."  
"Will that be all, Mr Stark?"  
"That'll be all Miss Potts." The call disconnected.


	2. Paint the town red

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pepper and Tony talk. Tony causes some chaos as Iron Man. The Avengers look damn good in matching outfits.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe I finished this already since the last chapter, I couldn't stop, I was a woman possessed. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. And I hope I can finish the next chapter in a timely manner, maybe by tomorrow?

Sat across from Pepper on a day like today, Tony realises how much he misses her. Usually he's so busy with super villainy or inventing binges he doesn't notice. However with her here, smiling at him as she talks about the troubles of being CEO and her life with Happy, he can't help but feel the gaping hole she left behind. He's still happy for her of course, what she has with Happy is beautiful and she loves him. Tony is over her, the feelings he harboured for Pepper have passed, now he's just glad they can be like this, friends, platonic life partners. For her or Rhodey he would do anything and he believes they'd do the same. They're his best friends and what each of them share is sacred, he wouldn't change it for the world. But he misses her, how could he not? Pepper is perfect and everything he isn't and more, he would give her the world if he could, however she would probably be annoyed with him if he conquered the world, so none of that.

"Ah, Tony, you probably haven't read the e-mail I sent you about it so I'll remind you now. There's a charity gala on Thursday that you have to attend." At his groan she simply smiled indulgently, " I know you don't like them but it's for a good cause, and it will be good PR, which we need. So you'll be going and you'll make it look like you're enjoying yourself. Also no drinking, before, during or after. Maybe after if you must but I'd really prefer you didn't." And when she put it like that how could he refuse.  
"I'll be there, and I'll smile, but I will be doing minimum talking to those rich snobs." He turned up his nose as if one was right there in front of him.  
"Those 'rich snobs' are your investors and shareholders Tony, and some might even call you one of them." She laughed though, and Tony swears whenever Pepper Potts laughs an angel is born.  
"I resent that, I may be rich but I am no snob." And there's another one, he could survive off of those laughs alone.

However all good things must come to an end, especially for Tony, and so Pepper must return to her busy life and Tony to his villainous planning.  
"Remember, the gala at 7:00pm, wear the blue suit that I like. If you're keeping track of the days, Tony, it's three days from now, Thursday night, me and Happy will meet you there. I think Rhodey said he'd try and be there as well. I'll see you then." Then in true Pepper Potts fashion she hurried off barely giving him time to say good bye. When he got back to the tower he had Jarvis set a reminder for Thursday. Then he went to his lab, and from there to his secret lab hidden in his wall, the one he used for all his super villain projects. He's going to paint the town red, literally, with red paint, and gold, it's going to be incredible.

_______________

He finished his next plan that night. It was fool proof, probably, Tony had no fools to test with so he wouldn't know. He'd started by making a simple robot, programmed to move around a specific part of the city which he directed it to, to attack (not lethally though) and finally to explode; that's the interesting part. He set his bots, and Jarvis in control of all the machinery, to mass produce this robot so he'd have enough to keep the avengers busy. He wasn't trying to hurt anybody with this latest plan, he never really planned to hurt anybody especially not civilians, he was merely trying to cause some chaos, be a bit of a nuisance. The robots were filled with red or gold paint, when they blew up the paint would go everywhere, he'd tested it and the paint coverage was incredible. They were programmed to explode early if they were about to be or currently were being destroyed, so all the paint would be used. And any avenger nearby would be covered in paint along with everything else. Just a bit of harmless fun. And a way to mark his territory slightly, in his signature red and gold, there'd be no doubt that Iron Man was the perpetrator of this particular prank.

He left the tower (through a secret exit of course, wouldn't want anyone realising Tony Stark is Iron Man) at 12:00, your average person would be awake by then right? He took to the streets of New York, him in his Iron Man armour followed by a veritable army of his robots. Civilians lined the streets, events like this always made it clear who were New Yorkers and who were tourists, tourists ran screaming, New Yorkers got their phones out so they could Instagram it when the Avengers got there. Some New Yorkers were even happy to see him, he'd read a few articles about how he never actually hurt anyone so it seemed public opinion of him had actually gone up a little. Everybody knew it would be an interesting fight when Iron Man was there and they knew they wouldn't get hurt.

It takes maybe five minutes before he sees the Avengers on the horizon, he wonders if he disturbed their breakfast. The Avengers probably did cutesy things like team breakfasts, did one of them cook? Did they have a in house cook? Maybe they ordered? No, Tony thinks they probably cook for themselves, Cap would probably feel bad if they had a hired cook. Maybe Brucie cooked? Or the Falcon, he seemed like that type, from what he'd heard on the comms he sometimes intercepted, Falcon was the mum friend.

They were close enough now he could discern each one, and look at that Spidey had decided to join them, he was an unofficial avenger, maybe he'd been at team breakfast. He stopped and let his robots go ahead, they flooded the streets in what Tony considered to be a beautiful sight. He watched with baited breath as the avengers engaged with the robots, the fun would start soon, he should probably get out of the way, don't want to get any paint on his suit.

Iron Man flew to a nearby building, close enough to see the fight but not close enough to be caught in the chaos, if the robots got closer to him he'd just move to another building, or hover, he could do that to. He was in the perfect position for when the first explosion happened. Having intercepted the comms he could hear and see the panic as bright red paint flew in every direction. It covered everything, including a wide eyed Thor, who had been the one to set off the reaction.  
"Thor, are you okay?! What is that stuff?" That was Capsicle's voice, he always gets so worried.  
"I am well, good Captain. The substance is merely paint." Tony swore Thor only talked like that to mess with everyone else. He couldn't genuinely speak so archaic like all the time, it simply wasn't convenient.  
"If it's just paint, can't we just leave them to explode by themselves, as they seem to be set to do?" That was Hawkeye, spoil sport that he was trying to ruin Tony's fun.  
"They're still programmed to attack things, if we leave them be they'll wreck everything around here, it's better if we get rid of them all, paint's easier to deal with than a wrecked building, cheaper too." Spidey is so grown up, being the voice of reason and using common sense, Tony feels   
Ike a proud dad.  
"What you're saying is we have no choice but to get ourselves covered in paint, great, perfect, peachy." Falcon continued to grumble for the next few minutes, Cap occasionally interjecting with positive things to think about, like puppies.

Several more robots blew up, some in red that was almost reminiscent of blood except for its quantity (that would be an awful lot of blood), and gold that glittered in the midday sun. What better way to spend his day. However that was interrupted when he got calls from Pepper _and Rhodey_ simultaneously.  
"Hello my two most favourite people in the world, to what do I owe the pleasure?" He tried to sound cheery, which honestly wasn't that difficult, he always does have fun messing with the avengers.  
"What are you doing Tony?" That was Pepper, she didn't sound so happy.  
"It's all over the news, a better question might be why are you terrorising New York midday on a Tuesday?" Rhodey definitely didn't sound happy.  
"Because it's fun...? If it helps Tony Stark will be donating money to help clean up the mess Iron Man is making." Which is true, this area needs cleaning anyway, and a paint job might make some of these buildings much nicer.  
"I really wish you wouldn't do this Tony." Rhodey makes an affirmative sound to say he agrees with Pepper's statement.   
"I'm not hurting anybody! It's just a bit of harmless fun. Guys please don't give me that disappointed silence."  
"We're not disappointed Tony, we just, me and Pepper, we wish you hadn't turned to villainy to solve your problems."  
"You could have just as easily gone into the hero business Tony, you don't have to skirt the law, you don't have to be hated by the people." They'd had this conversation countless times, but Pepper and Rhodey never gave up.  
"I'll have you know I am not hated by the people," he may not be loved but he certainly wasn't hated, "And you know all the red tape I'd have to go through if I had become a hero, this way is easier, safer even." They both sighed in a resigned fashion.  
"If you believe so Tony. Just remember we're here for you if you need anything, okay?" Tony wished he didn't make Rhodey sound like that, but it is how it is.  
"Of course, I love you guys."   
"We love you too." And with that final message, tinged with sadness, from Pepper he ended the call, reverting his attention back to the battle.

They had destroyed maybe half the bots. No surface was untouched by the paint, red or gold. The combination of the colours made the sight feel quite Christmassy which was fitting for the time of year. Thor was quite clearly thoroughly enjoying himself a wide smile graced his lips as he ran around destroying bots that would then explode paint all over him, adding to the tons of paint already adorning his body. The Hulk, from what he could tell, seemed to be stopping every few robots to jump in the puddles of paint. Spidey was whooping as he swung from paint covered building to building. In fact all of the Avengers seemed to be showing signs they were enjoying themselves, a small smile even gracing Black Widow's mouth, the gold paint made her look almost ethereal. He couldn't see Bucky, but the Winter Soldier was even joining in on the light banter over the comms, so he must have been in an especially good mood.

It occurred to Tony that they were laughing and enjoying themselves because Tony had provided them with a fun activity. For the Avengers, running around in paint, beating up robots (and ones that weren't really even trying at that) must have been really fun, in fact it actually sounded fun to Tony. They must have felt like kids at playtime, and it brought a strange smile to Tony's face, knowing he could do that for them. If he kept up behaviour like this his reputation as a villain would be ruined.

With one last sweeping look over the battlefield/playground, he gave the command for all of the remaining robots to explode. He watched the streets burst with red and gold. And as he flew away he heard the booming laugh of Thor and the excited roar of the Hulk. What a wonderful way to start his day.

____________

Thursday came around quickly enough. The paint project, as Tony liked to call it (the alliteration sounds nice) had been all over the news. After the more dangerous robot parts had been cleared they'd let the public mess around in the paints, the internet was covered in heartwarming videos of children playing together in the paints making a mess of themselves.

People had talked about how having fun in the paint had foiled Iron Man's evil plan, turning it into something good for the city. However Tony himself liked to think that his plans went even better than expected, he thought of it as his early Christmas present to the city. He, along with the rest of Stark industries, had all gone out to have fun in the paint as well.

He'd then seen Pepper and Rhodey, in a wonderful turn of events, their stern looks had quickly broken into smiles and the three of them, and Happy joined them not long after, proceeded to have an hour of fun like they hadn't had in a long time together. The event had brought many New Yorkers together, being dubbed a 'Christmas miracle' of sorts. There was in fact talk of planning another Paint Party on the streets for next year, possibly to become an annual event.

So Tony saw what happened as an incredible, resounding success that he could never have hoped for, and then those good, fuzzy feelings had carried through to Thursday night.

Now he was in a car on his way to the charity gala, dressed to the nines in Pepper's favourite suit, and he just couldn't seem to shake the good mood. Then when he arrived he was greeted by Rhodey, Pepper and Happy, adding to his amazing feeling. They entered the gala together making small talk, ignoring the flashing paparazzi lights. They took their seats, Pepper got a glass of wine, Rhodey good friend that he was, showed his solidarity by getting a none alcoholic drink.   
"Tony, in the interest of getting you here there may have been a certain fact I...omitted." Pepper looked sheepish, slightly guilty, it didn't seem to be anything too serious or life threatening though. He sighed before asking.  
"What haven't you told me, Pep?" He saw her tense before answering.  
"The Avengers are on the guest list." Judging by the equally shocked looks on Rhodey and Happy's faces (though Happy most likely in excitement for meeting the Avengers, not worry about Tony's secret identity, considering he didn't know it) Pepper had been the only one to know about this.  
"I can't be here, this is a terrible!" He may have been panicking slightly, but he thinks he justified in doing so.  
"Pepper what if they found out!"

At that moment (as if the universe had a hand in it) the Avengers walked through the door, all sporting high fashion clothes in gold or red. Tony noticed his mouth wasn't the only one in the room that had dropped. What could have looked quite tacky had been smoothly pulled off by each one individually and seeing them all together like that was beautiful. Extra incredible was that they were sporting _Tony's_ colours, the red and gold of his Iron Man suit, he might actually be on the verge of popping a boner, which would be extremely embarrassing.

Black Widow, as always, looked beautiful, she was wearing a one shoulder, fitted, deep red dress. With golden jewellery shaped as flowers, with her ever present arrow necklace. Her lips were deep red like her dress and her eyes shimmered gold.

His eyes glide over the other Avengers, eventually settling on _Steve, Mr Adonis himself_. And for a few moments it doesn't make sense, and then he thinks about seeing Barnes with Steve and maybe Steve is his plus one, but then a second later he realises, and of course how could he think anything else? It's so glaringly obvious now that Steve is Captain America and how hadn't he realised this before? He looked closely at Steve and Bucky, at Captain America and The Winter Soldier, and noticed that they were wearing matching suits and looking damn fine in them.

Steve's was black suede, gold embroidery around the elbow joint, he wore a dark red shirt underneath, to completely tie in with the theme. Bucky's suit was dark red suede, gold embroidery on the collar, wrapping around the back of his neck. He wore a black shirt underneath. And now that Tony saw how beautiful these two men were, he couldn't see anything else. He thinks he might be drooling, that would explain the strange looks he was getting from Pepper, Happy, and Rhodey.

The thing is for Tony Stark a bad situation (if this can truly be called a bad situation) can always get worse. So of course Steve caught his eye, recognition lighting up his face. He turned and said something to Bucky, then the rest of the Avengers, and they somehow came to the decision that they were all going to _follow Steve towards Tony_. He was full blown panicking now, he'll admit, so much so that Rhodey had to nudge him gently and remind him to breathe. Quickly he uttered reassurances that he was okay before Steve arrived, all the Avengers behind him.

"Hey Tony, how are you?" Steve seemed to be another Pepper, his smile lit up the entire room.  
"Oh..uh...yeah I'm good, been busy inventing...and stuff," inventing exploding paint robots that is "you?"  
"I've been good, I'm glad you're okay, stressful situations like that can be hard to recover from."  
"I've been through worse." Afghanistan, but now wasn't the time to be thinking about that. "What's with the colour scheme, can't be good press sporting the colours of a super Villain?" Steve huffed a laugh.  
"Maybe not, but we all wanted to," Hawkeye and Falcon both cough at that, so maybe the decision wasn't so unanimous, but it wasn't like they didn't look good " Iron Man did something good for the city, for us, on Tuesday. We wanted to represent what that day was, people coming together and having fun together. We certainly had fun, so we thought we'd wear the colours again, only this time less paint. It took me ages to get that stuff out of my hair." Tony laughed at the light flush on Steve's face, wasn't he adorable.  
"Well you all look good, you should wear matching outfits more often." They all laughed a little at that, and then descended into easy conversation. The Avengers each took a seat at the empty table, Steve taking a seat by Tony and Bucky the one beside Steve, so the two of them could keep talking with occasional interjections from Bucky, all of which made Tony laugh uncontrollably. Sam and Rhodey got along like a bush on fire, talking about their time serving. Natasha and Pepper talked conspiratorially, they were probably planning to take over the world, they'd succeed too, Tony had no doubts.

Thor, Clint and Happy were talking about...something, maybe the joys of bashing in the heads of your enemies? Tony couldn't tell, but they were clearly enjoying themselves. Bruce returned with drinks, he sat across from Tony and from that moment onwards they were lost to science for the rest of the night. By the end of the night Bruce had an open invitation to the tower's labs whenever he pleased so he and Tony could Science together (and yes Science is a verb, Tony does lots of sciencing. Also he finally has Bruce as his Science Bro!).

He left that night in a daze, because some how he had managed to befriend the Avengers, as Tony Stark, and they still had no idea he was Iron Man.

 


	3. I See Why My Boyfriend Likes You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Iron Man and The Winter Soldier. Tony Stark and James "Bucky" Barnes. Plus Peter Parker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't expecting to get this up till tomorrow because I spent the day with my friend, yet here it is. It may not be very long, but here it is. Please enjoy!

By cover of night Tony participated in the more... dangerous aspects of villainy. This time is when he'd get to exploding the buildings, and harming the people. It should be noted that these people were by no means innocent, far from it in fact. These people deserved whatever Tony gave them.

The aftermath of Afghanistan brought to light a number of things, mainly Obadiah's betrayal. When he created the Iron Man suit, after Mark 1 in the cave, Tony saw he had two paths he could take. Path number one being the path of a so called 'hero'. He could follow the law, do things by the book. However he knew what would inevitably happen if he followed that path, crooked officials trying to get their grubby hands on the iron man armour, he'd be tied up in so much red tape he wouldn't be able to get anything done.

So there was the easier route. He could have become a vigilante, like Spider-man or Daredevil, but that came with its own troubles. He chose the path of the 'villain', skirting the law, doing what he wanted. He could blow up whichever building he chose and hurt anybody that needed to be hurt, with the added bonus of being able to mess with the heroes when he was bored. Admittedly being a villain was sometimes difficult, but very rarely did he feel he made the wrong choice.

On nights like these he was sure in his decision to be a villain, because it meant he could do things like torture the scum in front of him. Listen to the man scream all the information Tony needed as he broke each of his fingers one by one.  
"Where will the deal be going down?" The man seemed more intent on sobbing than answering his questions so he heated up the repulsors just a little bit and pressed them to the man's skin, as some incentive to answer Tony's questions.  
"T-th-the d-docks" Always the docks, do bad guys not realise that always having their super secret deals go down at docks means the heroes and vigilantes will eventually catch on. Tony sighed.  
"How many people will be there?"   
"H-Hustovi will have t-two bodyguards with him. Van Achteren w-will have may-maybe twenty." The man looked as though he was about to pass out, Tony would have to wrap this up here. He left the man tied up and went up to the roof.

He stopped dead when he realised he wasn't alone, in the shadows was another life form. When the person realised they had been spotted they emerged from the shadow, and strangely enough Tony found himself relaxing slightly knowing it was only The Winter Soldier.

"I didn't know you did the torture thing Iron Man. Wouldn't want the Avengers to find out, they have quite a high opinion of you, for a villain." Barnes wasn't being particularly menacing, so it was safe to assume he wasn't about to be brutally murdered, not that the soldier could get to him through the armour, probably.  
"He was a henchman, it's practically in their job description, I wasn't doing anything too terrible." He edged slightly away from the soldier, a perfectly natural reaction, not because he was a tiny bit terrified of what the soldier could do. The soldier seemingly decided to get a little closer just to mess with him, which wasn't nice of him. However it was more Barnes than Winter Soldier to mess with people, so that was probably a good sign.  
"I suppose not, can't say I haven't done the same thing, so I'll keep it between us. Widow will probably find out though, she has her ways." The talk with no fighting or attempting to apprehend him was putting Tony on edge, he could be trying to get his guard down.  
"Omniscient being that she is. So are we going to get to the fighting bit? You know, you trying to catch me and haul me into S.H.I.E.L.D, me flying away all ' _you can't catch me I'm the gingerbread man'_? Is that ringing any bells? Because I'm pretty sure that's what we're supposed to be doing? Am I wrong?" He's rambling again but his worries are legitimate. The soldier simply laughed at him.

"I'm not here to catch you or whatever you're thinking, I'd just come out for a midnight stroll and happened upon you." He doesn't seem like he's lying, but he is the worlds best assassin, so the chances are he'd be able to lie to Tony without being detected.  
"Couldn't sleep?"  
"Wasn't tired."  
"I could think of a few ways to wear you out."  
"I don't tire easily, do you think you'd be up to it?"  
"I'd be able to take you _and_ Cap, at the same time."   
"I wouldn't be so sure about that, we wouldn't go easy on you." That actually sounds like heaven, he'd kill to be in that super soldier sandwich.  
"Like Cap could be anything but sweet and gentle."   
"You don't know what I do, Captain America isn't as innocent as he looks." And that leaves Tony speechless, he splutters trying to come up with a reply but he can't think of anything but what Barnes was implying. Not only that he knows what Capsicle is like in bed, but that Capsicle 'isn't as innocent as he looks'. His brain spiralled into all the possible different Kinks Captain America could possess.  
"Cat got your tongue, Iron Man?" He searched for a moment for something to say.  
"I just...wasn't expecting that." A smile graced Barnes' face.  
"I must be on my way now, you should be on yours, until next time." Then he disappeared into the shadows, Tony having no idea where he could have gone. As he flew back to the tower he pondered over his conversation with Barnes.

______________

In a strange turn of events Tony hired one Peter Parker as his new assistant/apprentice, Peter Parker, AKA Spider-Man. When Peter's name appeared in his pile of applicants for the position he hadn't been expecting it, having done only the briefest of checks after finding out his identity. However after seeing his name he immediately knew that the position had been filled. He'd called Peter in, he'd start work the next Monday, and now Monday had come around.

Tony awaited Peter at the entrance (which earned him some strange looks from his employees). He'd attempted to get some sleep last night, and had made himself seem well presented this morning. He didn't usually bother, especially not in the mornings, but he'd do anything for Spidey.  
A sleek black car (which seemed suspiciously S.H.I.E.L.D like) pulled up and out of the passenger side stepped Peter, and then out of the driver's side came Barnes. He was dressed to blend in, jeans, t-shirt (which Tony noted had the Captain America symbol on it.), sunglasses and his hair tied back in a bun, which looked far too good on him.

Tony had assumed Peter would want to keep his connection to the Avengers secret but clearly not, as they approached him together.  
"Hello Mr Stark, sir. It's a pleasure to meet you and to be working for you! I'm Peter, but you probably already know that!" Peter rambled on adorably, Tony could already tell this was going to be so much fun.   
"Please, call me Tony. I'm happy to have you here, and Mr Barnes it's nice to see you again. Peter if you'll go to the front desk to get your identity card, they'll give you all the boring details I can't be bothered with." With a quick 'yes, Sir!' Peter hurried off.

Tony expected Barnes to just say good bye and leave, instead he stuck around to talk for a few moments.  
"How have you been Barnes, everything going well in Avenger land?"   
"Call me James, and everything has been fine, the villains have been oddly quiet since Iron Man's paint robots. We're just waiting for the next thing to come up." James didn't seem very interested in small talk; he had to be here for another reason.  
"I take it the life of a hero is never quiet for long, but I don't think you're here to talk about that."   
"I'm just trying to get a better idea of why my boyfriend is so taken with you."   
"Your boyfr-? Oh! Steve, I don't think he's quite taken with me, but if he were it would be for my good looks and stellar personality."  
"For your modesty as well, clearly." Tony laughed.  
"James I am the most modest person you will ever meet."  
"I'm seeing that, but you are right on accounts of your good looks." James pointedly looked Tony up and down. Tony was a grown adult man, he didn't blush, the heat in his cheeks had to be from something else.  
"I've got to go now, but you should come to movie night on Friday, Me and Stevie," he calls him Stevie how cute,"would like it. So would Banner, he doesn't like not having anybody to talk Science with. If you come at about six you'll get pizza as well, we always get enough food to feed an army. See ya Stark." James left as Peter returned.

"I've got everything I need Mr St- Tony. Where next?" Judging on Peter's correction time he'll get used to calling him Tony pretty quickly.  
"There are some things I need to work on in my personal lab, so you'll be with me there, I can show you some of my cool toys. More importantly, I didn't know you had connections with the avengers." Peter looked appropriately sheepish.  
"Ah...my Aunt May is friends with Peggy Carter, she was a part of the family if not by blood. Peggy introduced me to Steve and Steve introduced me to the rest of the Avengers, they sort of...'adopted' me, I guess? They let me hang out with them." That was certainly a S.H.I.E.L.D spun lie if Tony had ever heard one. It might have been almost believable if not for the little known fact that Agent Peggy Carter was in fact Auntie Peggy for Tony. Also Tony knew the truth about Peter, that too.

They boarded the private elevator to Tony's lab together.  
"I imagine being friends with The Avengers gets you lots of attention at school."   
"None of them know, I don't talk with my fellow students often." Tony took a glance at Peter, he didn't seem particularly sad about that, more like he had accepted it.  
"I was the same, didn't have any friends till I met Rhodey. I was always too far ahead of the people my age, and too far behind in years for those in my classes. At least you have the Avengers.  
"Yeah, I'm really lucky to have them." The elevator doors opened into his lab, he spared a moment to appreciate the look of wonder on Peter's face before moving through the room.  
"J, bring up the blueprints for Falcon's wings, I have a few ideas. Oh and the ones for the widow bites. You know what, just bring up the blueprints for each of the Avengers respective tech, and any group tech," he addressed the next part to Peter. "I figure if I'm going to attend movie night, might as well come bearing gifts, obviously don't tell them and what not. They deserve something for all the good they do for the city." And Tony wants a little more of a challenge. He'd noticed the weak points, might as well try and help with them.

"Peter you can go over them too," as he said this all the blueprints came to life around them, he suspects Jarvis did that just for dramatic effect, amazing sidekick that he is. "Anywhere you see something that you think could be improved, tell me, even better if you come with an idea of how to fix it. Now, let's get to work."

They proceeded to spend the rest of the day finding things to improve in the tech and noting down any ideas they had for fixing it. By the time Peter had to leave Tony had a number of ideas for each piece, which he would start working on immediately. He also had a new found respect for Peter, and by extension Spidey, the kind that could only come from sciencing together. He worked well into the night and the next day, engrossed in his projects, with help from Peter during his work hours. Eventually, however, Wednesday came to disturb him.


	4. He's Obviously Our Favourite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Villain vs Villain + Avengers. We all know he's our favourite. What makes a hero?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Does this make three days in a row? Who abducted me and replaced me with a more productive, consistent and concentrated person? Please enjoy this update!

There were many pros to having connections with superheroes, beyond just fighting with them, like having people to save you quickly when you're in a bank robbery. However there are a few cons, the main being the other villains. Villains aren't typically very friendly people, but they usually have respect for each other; Tony had even heard that there's a special bar somewhere specifically for villains, and they hangout and talk shit about the heroes.

They don't like Tony though. All the other villains he had interacted with so far had in fact kind of hated him. They don't like him being friendly with superheroes like Spider-Man and The Avengers, they don't like that he banters good naturedly with them, and that he isn't actively trying to kill or capture them.

Their dislike for him isn't usually a problem, except for days like today.

Days where he was stuck squaring off against another villain. It should be mentioned that this doesn't actually happen that often. The last time was only because he insulted The Green Goblin on his...everything. This time he was being attacked because of his connection with The Avengers, it was inevitable but no less annoying for it.

Most annoying was that it was happening in broad daylight, at midday, on a busy New York street. Doctor Doom (how do villains come up with these names?) had come out in full costume and started shouting insults and taunts to draw Iron Man out. Tony wasn't going to go, until Doctor Doom started threatening to hurt the civilians. So he found himself suited up and standing across from Doctor Doom, repulsors warmed up and ready to fire.

The civilians had gone to cover, but they were so used to this by now they were just stood on the sidelines filming the fight. They were too close for Tony's liking, if Doctor Doom wanted to he could hurt anybody in the vicinity of them, but the people weren't going to move even if he asked them nicely, they were New Yorkers. He would simply have to try and protect all of them, whilst protecting himself, and preferably without causing mass property damage. Just another average day then.

Von Doom attacked first. With superhuman speed he raced at Iron Man, planting a solid hit to the chest that sent Tony flying backwards. He used the repulsor jets to stabilise himself then shot five consecutive shots at Doom, one to the left shoulder, the right, the chest, one to each leg. They did little to slow the metal man down, they seemed to be merely an inconvenience to him; Tony decided to use a more direct approach. He used the repulsor jets to propel him to Doom, engaging in hand to hand blows, blocking each of Doom's attempts to get him.

"Engage missiles, J!" He was starting to get breathless, but he was doing well.  
"Target locked, launching 3,2,1." Tony moved back from Doom as the missiles hit their target, explosions engulfed Doom for a few moments but when they cleared, Doom's figure still stood. Doom shot a bolt of energy straight at Tony that he narrowly missed (was super-human strength and durability not enough for this guy? He needed sorcery too?) things were looking bad for him, he wasn't a good match against Doom.

He pried the lamppost next to him out of the ground and swung it at Doom, effectively putting space between them, he needed to think of a plan quickly. He took to the air, evaluating what he had at his disposal.  
"Need some help Iron Man?" Spidey of all people was hanging next to him.  
"What are you doing here?" Doom was dangerous, Spidey could get himself hurt, and Tony wanted Peter to turn up for work tomorrow.  
"I got a call saying you needed some help, the others are coming too. Not to mention that this is my city, and when villains are fighting I'm honour bound to break it up." He had some suspicions on who could have sent that call.  
"I apologise, Sir, I feel it is necessary you have help in this particular fight. You are lacking certain aspects of the skill set required to stop Mr Doom." Tony accepted Jarvis' treachery easily, it couldn't be helped.  
"Think you could web up are little friend down there, Spidey?" Doom was approaching them again, thankfully he had yet to move on the civilians, to Tony's great relief.  
"Of course, but not because you told me to." Spidey proceeded to swing around Doom shooting webs to encase him, but as quick as he could do it, Doom was ripping them off.

Tony went to ground level, keeping Doom busy to help Spidey, it slowed Doom down somewhat, giving Spidey more time to wrap him up. It helped keep Doom in one place, but he could still fight perfectly well, which was clear as he traded blows with Iron Man.

Tony wasn't expecting the shield that flew into Doom's side, sending him flying. Looking around he realised the Avengers had surrounded him and Doom while they were fighting.  
"You're looking a little worse for wear Iron Man." That was James, stood next to Steve whose mighty shield had been returned to him.  
"You're dangerous and you only have one metal arm. This guy is all metal, and magic. Did I mention he can do magic? Because he can do magic and I don't think I express my hatred for magic often enough." Tony had moved to the other side of Barnes, joining The Avengers in circling Doom. Doom seemed to notice his predicament as he looked around the circle, it became apparent that he also realised his chances of winning had lowered drastically.  
"I'm not just dangerous for my arm. My sniper skills are second to maybe only Clint, but that's only because he can use a bow. I'm the most dangerous assassin in the world, people didn't even think I existed, I was a myth. I'm skilled with guns, knives, hand to hand, anything, you name it. It's not just the arm."  
"You're a bit too defensive of that." Not that it wasn't cute, which is a word Tony didn't ever think he'd use to describe _The Winter Soldier_ of all people.

Doom tried to send bolts of magic at different people, but most of them just dodged, Thor deflecting it with his hammer. Everything seemed a lot easier now he had back-up.  
"I'm not _defensive_ , I just think you should know all the facts." Steve laughed at that, Barnes giving him an offended, slightly betrayed look.  
"Don't look at me like that, you're being defensive, it's funny." Barnes was full on glaring now, which was _terrifying_.  
"I trusted you, Rogers." Which Steve laughed at. It was a true show of Captain America's strength that he could stand up to Barnes' glare.  
"Sir, I recommend you detain Doctor Doom, he appears to be planning an escape. The Hulk-proof rope you developed should be able to work until S.H.I.E.L.D arrives." Doom was fighting off the Avengers (who it seemed Bucky, Steve and Tony had left to fight on their own, too busy talking with each other. Whoops) he wasn't making any headway but they should bring this to an end. Tony deployed the Hulk-proof rope, it made quick work of Doom.

"Thanks for the help, Avengers, your work here is done." Tony wasn't expecting them to just leave, but a man could hope.  
"We're going to wait for S.H.I.E.L.D to get here." Steve was back in his Captain America authority mode.  
"Well, I'll be on my way th-" Black Widow interrupted him, stepping forward as she spoke.  
"Iron Man, we worked well together today."   
"Uh-yeah?"   
"Why are you a villain? You could be a hero." Straight to the point then. Out of all the Avengers Black Widow wasn't one of the ones he expected to have a good opinion of him.  
"I'm a villain because it's what I want to be, I'm no hero." He immediately got out of there, they weren't going to have that conversation.

____________

The team had gone back to their S.H.I.E.L.D barracks after helping Iron Man with Doctor Doom, they had gathered for team lunch prepared by Bruce while they were out.  
"Oh my god, Nat, you can't just ask people why they're a villain!" Clint seemed to be referencing something that Steve didn't understand, everyone but he and Bucky were laughing. If even Thor had seen this then it's probably somewhere on his list. Natasha rolled her eyes at Clint.  
"I was simply stating what we were all thinking."   
"Still."  
"I was right to ask, Clint."  
"She's right, we all know Iron Man is our favourite villain anyway," Steve looked at Bucky in surprise. "You know what I mean, he never hurts any civilians, his plans are usually funny." He looked at Peter for his next point. "He found at you were underage and stopped doing dangerous things around you, he actually _worries_ about you. So yeah, he's the best villain." By the end of Bucky's speech each of them was nodding along with him.  
"We can't do anything about it though, he's not going to convert just because we think he could." Sam, ever the voice of reason. Well, sometimes.  
"Not to mention S.H.I.E.L.D, they'd certainly have something to say about it." It was unlike Clint to say something that made so much sense.  
"S.H.I.E.L.D would be no issue, however the man of iron is unlikely to relinquish the secrecy of his identity."   
"We should try and convince him then, by any means necessary," they all looked at Peter strangely, "I didn't mean for it to sound so sinister."  
"Your point still stands, so all in for operation convert Iron Man?" Clint put his hand in the middle of the table, like he expected them all to do the same. After a few minutes of Clint's determination each of them gave in, putting their hands over Clint's to show they were partaking in the plan.

"I propose that our first mission be finding out his identity."

_____________

Tony was in his workshop, looking over the array of equipment in front of him. With help from Peter,  
and Jarvis, he'd been able to find ways to improve everything. He only had prototypes, because for some he didn't have what he needed, and he wanted to check with the owners before making any unwanted improvements, but he was sure they wouldn't turn it down.

For Steve he'd add things such as GPS tracking for the shield, so it could return to him no matter where he was on the field. For Natasha he had made the Widow Bites more efficient, they would be stronger (but the strength would be adjustable) and smaller, so easier to hide. For Clint he had some new arrows, exploding, sonic, GPS tracking, camera, and he'd had some ideas for prank uses for the arrows. He'd made Sam's wings better, the pack would be more compact, and the new design would allow for more manoeuvrability and speed in the air. Bruce he'd noticed had a clothing problem when he turned into the Hulk, so he'd made pants that would stretch to Hulk size, and then go back to Bruce size as the Hulk did.

He couldn't think of any way to make the hammer of Thor better (and he wasn't sure he could, fucking magic), so he'd gotten him a personal Stark phone, with special features to help Thor learn about humanity. He'd made guns for Bucky, but he had more than a few ideas for the arm. The problem with that is that it is James' arm, he probably wouldn't want Tony routing around in there, it was personal, and it had the potential to trigger memories from his time with Hydra. He'll ask James on movie night how he feels about it, rather than just assuming he'd be okay with it.

In truth he'd gotten all of this finished to distract himself. Distract himself from Natasha's words. He'd thought about it many times, of course he had, but he always came to the same conclusion; he had made the right choice, becoming a villain was the best way to do what he had to do. He could never stop himself from questioning though. What would it be like to be a hero? To be the 'good guy'?

"Jarvis?"  
"Yes, sir?"  
"What does it take to be hero?"


	5. Movie Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Movie night is here at last.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I stopped writing before Christmas and just couldn't start again! I finally convinced myself to start writing again, though it was a struggle. Please enjoy!

Tony had been up all night. working on more improvements for the Iron Man armour (he had to make it perfect, more than perfect). Now it's Thursday morning. When he went to fix something in the helmet he realised he didn't have the tool he needed, must have left it in the main lab. He picked up the helmet and went through, few people visited him except for Rhodey and Pepper, he'd be safe.

He muttered to the helmet as he walked. Rambling about different calculations and ideas.  
"Uh- Tony?" _Shit_ , shit! He'd completely forgotten about Peter.  
"This isn't what it looks like!" He'd frozen in place, like a deer caught in the headlights.  
"Really? 'Cause that looks an awful lot like the Iron Man helmet." Peter couldn't know, what if he told The Avengers?  
"It's a replica?" Why, oh why, did he pose that as a question?  
"Sir, I feel I should warn you that DUM-E is attempting to dismantle the rest of the suit." For fucks sake things had been going so well.  
"Hold this!" He passed the helmet off to Peter and ran to the other lab. He shooed DUM-E away from the mangled suit on the table, reprimanding him. DUM-E hid in the corner, Tony would have to apologise to him later.  
"You even have a secret lair. How hadn't I realised before? It's so obvious now." Peter had seen the lab now, there's no turning back.  
"Well, hindsight is 20/20. It should go without saying that you can't tell The Avengers, you can't tell anyone."

Peter set the helmet down on a table, moving closer to Tony.  
"I-but- The Avengers should know!" Peter shouted indignantly, throwing his hands up in frustration.  
"Should they? Tell me what would happen if they knew. Would they just keep the information to themselves? Carry on like nothing has happened? Or are they more likely to tell S.H.I.E.L.D, try and bring me in, imprison me? Maybe try and get me to join their stupid team? Will I get some kind of awesome redemption arc? Frankly I don't see things going well for me if anyone knows!"  
"You don't know that! All the Avengers like you, they would respect your wishes!" Peter got up in Tony's face. Which would have been more intimidating if Peter was, say, Captain America sized.

  
"They'd respect my wishes? They'd let me carry on doing what I do? Do you believe that after finding out the true identity of a villain, anyone would let them carry on about their daily business? No, Peter." Peter sighed and Tony knew he had won. At least for now.  
"I'm sorry you feel that way, Tony."

Peter began to move around the lab. Looking at all the things Tony thought would be too incriminating for his main lab. Namely the Iron Man armour.  
"Are you still going to movie night tomorrow?" The question from Peter was seemingly random.  
"Why wouldn't I be?" Tony had recommenced his work on the suit, but stopped to look at Peter.  
"If you're so intent on them not knowing. Why put yourself so close to them?"

  
"I like to live life on the edge," not to mention the crush of massive proportions he was harbouring for Steve and Bucky, because apparently his own heart hates him, "and they're interesting people. So it's risky, I'm always doing risky things."  
"At least I won't have to worry about giving it away. You're going to do that yourself."  
"Your complete and utter lack of trust in me is heartbreaking. I kept it from you didn't I?"  
"I worked here for four days before you walked right in front of me holding the Iron Man helmet, you're doomed."  
"What are you talking about? I'm a master of deceit." He puffed his chest out and wore a faux smug smile.  
"No, Natasha and James are, you know what else those two are good at? Getting information out of people. You're dead meat."  
"Stop being such a pessimist. I'm going to be fine."  
"Keep telling yourself that, we'll see how movie night goes."

______________

He watched the elevator numbers with increasing trepidation. Peter's words yesterday morning had stuck with him. Over and over again he'd decided to cancel and then changed his mind. There's no changing his mind now though, because he's on the elevator to The Avengers. Movie night is here and Tony is terrified.

The lighthearted _'ping!_ ' of the elevator is a sign of his impending doom. This is his last chance. Press the button and run away, and he was just about to do it, his arm raised but then the doors opened. He was faced with Peter, and that look was nothing but a challenge, and he never could back down from a challenge. He strode in with his usual confidence, staring straight into Peter's eyes.

"Hey Tony! We just ordered pizza, we'll start the movies when it gets here." That was Steve's bright voice.  
"Great! I love pizza!" The Avengers were scattered across the living area. Steve was sat on a sofa with Bucky, his hands combing through Bucky's locks. Natasha was sitting on the other sofa with Sam, Clint perched ( _perched_ ) awkwardly on the back. Bruce was huddled (because there was no better word for it) on the armchair. Peter was lounging on a beanbag by the armchair. Tony assumes that the two of them had bonded over science. Which was good for the three of them (because _science_ ). Yet quite bad for everyone and everything else.

The only open space was with Steve and Bucky. Of course his luck wouldn't allow for anything else. Stuck sat next to both of his crushes while they were being unbelievably affectionate. It both warmed his heart and hurt it, he had no idea how to feel.  
"Stark, get over here! I need to paint your nails!" The look on Natasha's face suggested something far more sinister than simple nail painting.

A quick inspection of each of the others nails revealed they were all painted in their colours: Steve- red, white and blue. Bucky- red, black and silver. Natasha- blood red. Clint- purple. Bruce- green. Sam- red, white. Thor- grey, red. Peter- red, blue.

"What colours do you want?" He pondered for a moment. Red and gold was tempting, what with everybody else having their colours. What if it was too obvious though? He could go with the arc reactor colours, but that's another thing associated with Iron Man. In the end someone else made up his mind for him. That person being Peter, the little shit.

"Red and gold! You should go with those colours." Peter chimed in, with a shit-eating grin. So much for Peter not revealing Tony's secret. At the odd looks Peter received from the others (and the killer glare Tony gave him) he explained his choice.  
"Well, I know red is your favourite colour Tony, but we already have so many red combinations. No gold yet though. So red and gold. Also didn't you guys all wear red and gold to the charity gala thing? The one where you became friends with Tony?" Tony calmed some at the accepting looks (even from Natasha, though he didn't trust any of her facial expressions, or words, or anything that she could fake) and accepted the colour choice with a shrug of his shoulders and a nod.

He settled on the floor by Natasha's feet, resting his hand on Natasha's thigh so she could begin. The atmosphere of the room was nice, calm. He felt drowsy, probably from the lack of sleep. Had he slept last night? He thinks so. Not for long though.

When she was done she smiled. Before giving him a harsh look.  
"If you dare smudge them." _It will be your funeral_. He nodded quickly, making his way over to his seat. He sat with Steve on his left, beyond Steve was Bucky. Pizza arrived soon after, Steve left to collect it, coming back with plates and cups. There was an excess of pizza, or what would be an excess for a group this size of normal people. Every flavour had been provided.

The non-enhanced humans were allowed to go collect their pizza first, so they'd actually get some. Then the super-humans and god came in like vultures. Steve, Bucky, Thor and Peter piling their plates high with food, until nothing was left, not even a scrap. Tony was man enough to admit he was gaping at the spectacle the four of them made, his own pizza forgotten in his hand.

When Steve settled back next to Tony, he laughed at the face he was making. Gently he pushed Tony's jaw back into place, which sent all kinds of feelings rushing through Tony.  
"High metabolism, we need this much food." He tried to find his voice again, a difficult feat considering what Steve had just done to his brain.  
"I-I know, just... _so much food._ " A chorus of laughter came from the room, apparently people had been listening in.  
"This is nothing Tony, you should have been there after the fight with the Chitauri!" Oh Brucie, he'd been at the fight, but he simply hadn't been _invited_ to the after party.  
"That was truly a great feast! Though the food provided on Midgard is little compared to the banquets held on Asgard." Tony tried to imagine a room full of people who ate as much as Thor, and how much food that would require, he couldn't. From everyone's faces they were trying to do the same, it brought the conversation to an immediate stand still.

"So, what movie should we watch? Clint you chose last time, so we aren't watching The Hunger Games, again." Was that exasperation in Sam's voice?  
"Sorry Katniss, maybe next time!" He infused his voice with mischievous glee. Clint merely rolled his eyes, how many times did he get that joke a day?

"Can we watch Wizard of Oz?"  
" _No, Steve_." Came from all but Tony, in eerie unison.  
"The Godfather?"  
"We get that you like that movie Bucky, but no."  
"And what do you suggest Peter?" Bucky's tone was full of derision.  
"Harry Potter, any of them, all of them, just Harry Potter."  
"I'm not physically capable of a Harry Potter marathon right now." Tony shuddered at the thought, he couldn't force himself to stay awake that long, but he couldn't _fall asleep_ with Harry Potter on. Pure sacrilege.  
"Do you have any requests Tony?" Sam was certainly getting desperate now, unsurprisingly.  
"It's not a movie, but how about BBC's Sherlock?" There was a moment of quiet consideration, before all seemed to accept.

The movies started and silence ruled the room. Everybody was engrossed, whether they be first time watchers or if this was the tenth watch through ( _cough_ Tony _cough_ ). The silence was broken suddenly by Steve.  
"Does the actor playing Sherlock...remind you of someone, he looks familiar." They all looked a little harder before Clint shouted with his realisation.  
"Strange! He looks like Doctor Strange." Quiet rumblings of both Tony and Bruce came, _no real doctor practices magic_ , they said. They made eye contact in solidarity.  
"He does, the resemblance is uncanny!" Peter stared with wide eyes, a barely noticeable shudder running down his spine.

They fell back into silence. It was at the beginning of the second season that Tony began to feel tired, more than just drowsy. Half way through the second episode he was drifting in and out of sleep, warm and comfortable and feeling inexplicably safe. By the end of the second episode he was out cold, with his head pillowed on Steve's shoulder.

\-----------------

When Tony awoke it was dark. He couldn't honestly call it awakening, considering he wasn't truly awake. He was, however, aware enough to realise they had moved in their sleep (for everyone was now asleep) so he was laid directly on top of Steve, cuddling even. Steve was laid on top of Bucky, who had his arms wrapped tightly around Steve. He tried to move, get away from the scene he was so clearly not supposed to be a part of. However he was stopped by heavy arms on top of him, Steve's arms holding him down. Tony's jostling seemed to have roused Steve slightly.  
"Lay 'own. 'O back t' sleep." He fumbled over his words, and how could Tony say no to that? So he settled back down and let himself drift off, blissfully free of nightmares.

 


	6. Fucking Loki

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mornings with the Avengers, pancake blocking, not fucking Loki.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hahahahahahahahaha guess who's back? Yeah it's me. How long has it been? Too long. As is normal with me I got distracted. Then in a bid to distract myself from other things I went into my works and remembered that this is a thing that I need to do. This ones a little shorter than usual I think. As always no one has read this but me before it gets to you, so there a probably so many mistakes, have fun!

"Tony? Tony, it's time to wake up." He turned away from the intruding voice, yawning widely.  
"Five more minutes, J" his words were slurred with sleep, the weak morning light irritating his eyes.  
When was the last time he'd slept so well? Clearly it was far too long ago. He was reluctant to wake up, with this much sleep his body might tell him he doesn't need more. His body was of course lying to itself, he's always desperately in need of sleep.

The artificial sound of a camera lens wakes him up immediately. Why would there be someone in his tower taking pictures of him? There wouldn't. It dawns on him embarrassingly slowly, he's not waking up in the tower, he hadn't gone home to the tower. He'd fallen asleep at the Avengers facility.

He sits up immediately, dizzy and disoriented. Blearily he looks at the people hanging above him. Steve is smiling unbelievably brightly, like he just won the lottery or something. Bucky is impassive, but he seems, maybe, softer? If that makes any sense. And then there's Peter, phone held up, mischievous smirk plastered across his face.  
"I want a raise."

Tony considers himself. His hair surely a mess, he rocks an awesome bedhead. His face lax from sleep. Clothes rumpled. He's a mess, but almost certainly an _adorable_ mess. Peter cannot be allowed to have that photo.  
"Done. Now delete it."  
"I need proof first." Tony pulls out his phone, sends a quick message to Pepper, and then shows that to Peter. He watches Peter delete it, because Peter knows that Pepper is all powerful and will certainly get him his raise.

"I hate you all, what's for breakfast?"  
"Pancakes. Want some?" Tony sees Bruce's head pop out from the kitchen doorway.  
"I would never turn down pancakes!" The buzz of his phone catches his attention, the screen reads Jarvis which is just plain odd. Jarvis rarely calls his phone directly, mostly he can deal with anything himself.  
"Excuse me a sec. Jarvis? What is it?" Some of his anxiety seeps into his voice, this is most definitely bad news.  
"I regret to inform you, sir, that the tower is being attacked by Hammer. Some of my security functions have been damaged as well as a few other systems." Tony cursed outwardly, it's too early for this. He'll have to drive back as well.  
"Keep him at bay for as long as you can, J."  
"Is everything alright, Tony?" That was Steve's concerned voice.  
"Ah, just a small altercation at the tower, nothing giant. But they need me over there. Sorry I'll have to miss breakfast."  
"Do you want me to come back with you, Tony?" Oh Peter's concern was so sweet, and whilst Spidey might come in handy. Especially now he knows who Tony is, it wouldn't be smart, the Avengers are at least a little smart.  
"That won't be necessary, Peter. It's your day off, enjoy it. Thank you for having me."  
"You can come again next week, if you'd like."

Tony apparently wasn't the only person surprised by Barnes' invitation. Steve looked at Barnes with a surprised smile. Peter looked like he was about to run for cover.  
"I'd like that." Those words sealed his doom. There was no doubt now. He loved the Avengers company and they were definitely going to find out his secret identity.

He had to hurry away, Jarvis was good but he didn't have a physical body. He couldn't hold Hammer off forever. The entire drive back he was distracted (honestly, he was surprised that he didn't crash) his thoughts flicking between the Avengers and how he was going to deal with Hammer.

The Tower was in worse shape than he'd thought it would be. Dark smoke billowed from one of the middle floors, and he sure hoped that wasn't R&D. He used the secret entrance, it lead straight to his lab and as such provided quick access to an iron man suit. On entry to the lab he was dismayed to find that Jarvis didn't welcome him, Hammer shouldn't be able to do this much damage.

A quick scan of the building (and why weren't those systems down) showed that Hammer was, in fact, on the R&D floor. Which wasn't good news, there were a number of things in there that he didn't want in Hammer's filthy hands. He travelled the fastest route to get to him, and gets the distinct feeling he arrived just in time. Hammer had no obstacles in his way, the last of Jarvis' defences worn down. The look on his face when he realised Iron Man was there to stop him was priceless.

"What are you doing here, Hammer?" He infused his voice with as much anger as he could manage.  
"I could ask you the same thing, _Iron Man_." Hammer spits his name like an insult. It was a good question, villains were often confused when Iron Man came to protect Stark Tower. It's strange nobodies connected the dots yet, but he won't complain. It does work in his favour.  
"A villain like you doesn't need to have anything from this room."  
"Why? Keeping it all for yourself?"  
"I don't need Stark to make my gadgets," Referring to himself like that always makes him laugh. "but I suppose a second rate villain and inventor like you would need it." He'd really made Hammer angry now, but at least that means he's attacking.

The device is interesting, similar to his repulsors in some ways, though more primitive, and in gun form. Though it is possible that if Hammer's minions were all equipped with these, along with something else, though he doesn't know what. They could infiltrate the tower, not discreetly but they could do it.

Hammer shoots. It hits his right shoulder. He's pushed back slightly, but these aren't as powerful as his own blasts, and the armour can withstand those.  
"Nice try, Hammer. But you'll have to try harder than that." He pushes forward with his own blasts, one after the other. Hammer appears to have some sort of rudimental defence against them. It isn't particularly strong. He's pushed back to the wall, Iron Man's gauntlet hovering over his chest.  
"Tell me, Justin. Do you want to get out of here alive." The fear in Hammer's eyes is palpable. He nods once.

Tony knocks him out, watching him crumple to the floor. Somebody would appear to collect him soon, and Iron Man couldn't be there when they did. He makes an effort to make it look like Iron Man leaves the building, then loops back and takes off the armour. So Tony Stark would be there to make a comment on the events that transpired. He'd paint it to be a super villain showdown, in his tower of all places. The reporters would lap it up, they always do. Because there's no way Tony Stark could be Iron Man.

He waited in the reception, it took no time at all before the first reporter trickled in. He was prepared, straightening himself. At one point he would have been surprised when the rushed reporter froze, along with everyone else in the room. His life had gotten a lot weirder since that point so he simply sighed.

The immortal nuisance Loki appeared in front of him, the most annoying smirk fixed to his face.  
"What did I do to earn the honour of your presence?" He kept his voice monotone in an effort to not show his anxiety over the situation. Not armed enough to take on Loki, surrounded by civilians.  
"Just came to check in, Stark." Tony cocked an incredulous eyebrow.  
"I'll opt to ignore your ulterior motive right now, just know that I know that you have one."  
"I wouldn't expect any less from you. You're smart, for a mortal." Tony gaped at the back handed compliment, because it _was_ a compliment.  
"Thank you?"  
"I feel I should warn you, you're getting too close to the avengers. It's bound to end badly."  
"Thanks reindeer games, but I know what I'm doing." The advice was making him uncomfortable. Loki wasn't known for his concern for others.  
"Do you? I understand that you've come to like Rogers and Barnes" he seemed to take great distaste in saying those names. "But is it really worth throwing everything away over?"  
"Slow down there, Ice Queen, I might start to think you care."  
"What a ludicrous suggestion. However my point stands, even you must realise that if you enter into a relationship with them they will find out your identity. So you either give up villainy, or you simply don't start a relationship. And I must advise you not to give up on villainy. If you stopped caring about innocents so much you'd make an amazing villain."

Tony gawked at the idea of a relationship with _either_ of them, let alone both. Then he thought about the second part. "I don't want to do either, can't I have villainy and them?" He knew how ridiculous his question was the moment he said it but it didn't change that he wanted it.  
"You know you can't, Stark." Tony sighed dejectedly at the truth in the liesmith's words.  
"Did you come here for any other reason than to ruin my hopes and dreams?" Tony doesn't like the serious face Loki takes on at that.  
"As a matter of fact I did. As I said, you're getting quite close to the Avengers. I find myself in need of a hostage, what's that saying you mortals use? Ah 'no hard feelings.'" it takes far too long for what's happening to dawn on Tony. By the time he has he has no time to counter it. The world is fading to black around him due to some magic shit and all he can do is glare at Loki as he falls into his arms.

\-----------------------

He wakes up tied to a chair. It wouldn't be the first time but it's usually under much more pleasurable circumstances. The rope around his wrists is too tight, the chair is hard and uncomfortable. The gag isn't a good look for him. At least Loki had left him his clothes. Loki had opted for a generic cell for this kidnapping, with an iron door opposite Tony's chair.

He's been conscious for at most five minutes when Loki comes in.  
"I apologise for all this, but it is necessary for a short while." Loki's voice is soothing and might've calmed him down had he not been tied to a chair. A series of incomprehensible chants come from Loki, and with a flash of magic a hologram appears between them. Again has Tony ever mentioned his hatred of magic, because he's going to say it now. In the hologram he sees the Avengers, talking hurriedly over what Tony assumes is lunch. Steve notices them first.  
"Hello Avengers, as you can see I have Tony Stark with me. I believe you know him?" Loki pauses a moment for dramatic effect, clearly he is enjoying this. "I want to play a game of hide and seek. So, come and find us." 


End file.
